They say his name is Lu and he is my cousin, but I dunno, dog. He doesn’t look like any dog I’ve ever seen and frankly, he doesn’t act like one either. Every dog I have ever met naps like 13 hours a day. Lu never sleeps, he just wrestles. Plus, he makes this weird snorty sound when he eats, like maybe he’s a piglet wearing a dog suit. It’s just not right. This weird alien dog has the sharpest teeth of any dog I have ever met. It’s like there’s a velociraptor in his mouth. I’m thinking about getting a sign to hang in the living room.
I mean seriously, he tried to pierce my ear. Do I look like the kind of dog that wants an earring?
The one nice thing about having a new puppy cousin is that we get to go for big walks with him.
Well, by “big” I mean “it takes an hour to get around our little block” and by “walks” I mean “alternating begging Lu to please walk and giving up and carrying him”.
In those rare “getting it” moments, we look like this: